Friday, 23 March 2007

Damn computers...


Eagles of Death Metal: Sound neither like The Eagles or Death Metal but just put on a damn fine show


My contribution to the an installation in the NGV. Mine's the little square thing with windows in the middle


The explanation behind an art gallery encouraging people like myself to play with lego




A cheeky video of the EoDM as they were so good


Having battled my way through some unique weather to get to this internet cafe, I'd better put on a new blog. Although I have been working quite a bit so it'll be short and sweet. When I say working a lot, it's not like I've been working every day, but just concentrated bursts, such as last weekend when I did over 12 hour shifts on both Saturday and Sunday. By the end of Sunday I think I had lost the plot a little.

The Friday night before that I went to see the Eagles of Death Metal, who put on one of the best gigs I've ever been to, I would say. So good that I sweat right through the t-shirt I was wearing from all the jumping about. This was then discovered by the people who I went to meet in a bar after the gig when they went to hug me/pat on the back, only to recoil in mild horror at the dampness. Hahaha.

Yesterday, with some time to kill before work, I went to the NGV, Melbourne's art gallery, as last time I was there I didn't really look all the way round. And how glad am I that I did go? Very, because they had an installation by a Danish guy, that basically consisted of about 60'000 pieces of white lego. The idea being that the public create a city skyline out of the lego. I would say I spent about a good hour making my masterpiece of architecture. It was funny listening to some of the people around me discussing the relevance of the installation, trying to imbue it with some kind of metaphorical meaning when my train of thought went something like this: "Ooooo, lego, I haven't played with lego for years!... YAY!"

According to my brother Jason, my dad has noticed that in a good many of the photos on the blog, there is something fairly gay happening. Looking back at some of them, this may be true. However, I feel it is balanced out by such photos as me assembling a chest of drawers, doing some manly DIY. (Although if you look closely enough, the hammer I was using was pink. Damn, so close....)

Finally, I have been told on more than one occasion that I sound like Hugh Grant. Luckily this was not by English people and so they probably do not recognise the difference in accent between me and the one-role wonder that is he.

Tuesday, 13 March 2007

Up to my kerb crawling ways again...

"Oh yes it's ladies night, And the feeling's right, Oh yes it's ladies night, Oh what a night"

Just in case the first picture didn't scare you enough. Notice the red symbol on Nick and Phil's hands. It is the sacred mark of the lady-man which we were all given.

The view at sunset from where I work. Not bad.


Today I have a day off from work. Having not worked a full 5 days in a row for quite a while, (approx 4 months) I feel I have fully earned this next couple of days off. On Saturday I worked this longest shift I've ever worked - 13.25 hours. Who says I'm a work-shy fop? So now, with some money coming in, I am back on track for doing all kinds of stuff up the East coast such as skydiving, scuba, a bit more surfing, seeing some of the islands etc. I would have done all that anyway, but my credit card would have taken the kind of beating usually saved for a ginger step-child along the way.

There aren't many photos this blog because my camera battery has just died but you got the most important ones there, the ladies night. On Monday, having just got back from work of an evening, I went to go sit down in the patio bit of the hostel only to be told by about 10 badly dressed she-males that I had to go get some womens clothes first. Just by our hostel there is a charity shop (called op-shops) that had a large pile of lady-like garments of
varying shapes, sizes and colourful arrangements. Bear in mind I had just been at work and so was going to collect womens clothes from a street pavement, then wear them whilst sober. At least the others had the advantage of being drunk through all this. In the end it was agreed that we all looked pretty damn good, apart from Ellis, second from the left on the back row who looked like a really scary tranny, as opposed to a bunch of guys in drag.

On Wednesday night I was on my way home at some obscure hour of the morning when a car pulls up beside me. The following conversation ensues:

"Hello, are you from around here" Yes, I am, sort of. (Thinking that they just want directions) "How long have you been living here for?" Oh, about a month and a half I guess. "Can we see some I.D please?" What? Why do you want to see my I.D? "Could we just see it please?" No, why would I give you my I.D, who are you? "Sir, you are walking through a prostitute-prone area late at night, now could we see some I.D?" You think I'm kerb-crawling?!? Hahahaha, I can't wait to tell my parents back home I've been stopped for kerb crawling!

At this point it was apparent to them that I was no longer taking them seriously and they quickly jotted down some details off my driving license and moved on. Hopefully I've been entered into some Aussie database of potential guys likely to procure a lady-of-the-night. So, in short, the police obviously thought I had the look of such man. But to be honest, it is impossible to walk back to my hostel without walking through a prostitute prone area, they're all over the place. Such is the glamorous lifestyle we backpackers lead.

Anyway, while spring begins to kick in back home, it's moving onto Autumn here, meaning we may get a few days in the 20's rather than constantly in the 30's. Boo hoo. But nevertheless, in about a month we are going to chase the sun North up the east coast. A month or so on the east and then we'll be making the jump into south east Asia and from there who knows? There is a half formed idea of trying to make it back home overland but not knowing where I might be a couple of weeks from now makes it more or less pointless trying to plan months ahead. And why would I want to when I can just run around in womens clothes instead?

Monday, 5 March 2007


Pretty much the most Australian comic book ever

Enfield the horse was my friend for a night.


Laneway Festival from a jaunty angle


I know I've made a Napoleon Dynamite reference in another blog but how much does this guy look like him? We weren't the only ones who spotted him



A slide show of some different graffiti around Melbourne CBD (I went on a hunt the other day)




This is a video of Nick drinking Baileys out of a shoe. It won't make sense to anyone who hasn't seen the Mighty Boosh. And even then you may ask 'why'? You would be right to ask that question. Nick seemed to enjoy it a lot more than when I did it, it made me gag just a little...


Without wishing to jinx myself, it would seem that I am now gainfully employed. I understand I may have confused a lot of you back home with my job hunting scenario. So I thought I'd give you a quick rundown of the jobs I've done (or not) so far. This one's my sixth, equalling in a month all the jobs i've ever had back home.

Job 1: Packing envelopes in a warehouse. Quit after 20 minutes because the other choice was suicide.


(Job 1.5: Went for an interview for a green energy company but couldn't bring myself to go to the training the next day as it was door to door. Even if it was for a good cause, at the end of the day it was still for a marketing company and they are the devil's bitches.)

Job 2: The Espy. Working at a big music venue in St Kilda, behind the bar. Manager was an arse and apparently I would never have got full-time work from them so I left after one shift.


Job 3: A club called Rebar. Re-opened after being closed for a year on a busy festival day, managers had intentions of re-opening for good. Managers are utter tools (and a touch dodgy) and will be bankrupt very soon.


Job 4: Bar Roy, a restaurant. Did a trial, gave me the uniform but never gave me any hours. Karma struck though, the girl who was meant to give me hours had her house broken into. Maybe slightly uneven karma but still...


Job 5: Rococo, Italian restaurant. Gave my job to someone local who they thought would be around longer. This kind of made me mad and I was on the verge of abandoning Melbourne completely

Job 6 (current job): The Great Provider, a restaurant in a marina. Rang me to offer me a job while I was in the toilet. I have actual shifts on a rota! The pay is better than any of the other jobs and I can see the sunset over the bay between the boat sheds.


So, hope that makes clear the fun I've had looking for work the last month. Much better than that was the Laneway festival we went to. Held in an alleyway, it was a lot better organised than I had originally anticipated. The clubs and bars that backed onto the alleyway were part of the festival as well, so everyone could use the back entrance to go and get food or drink etc. Best bands in my humble opinion were The Sleepy Jackson, Archie Bronson Outfit and Camera Obscura. A Swedish band called Love Is All were good too.

I was going to add a few pictures of Phil's head being shaved but the computer is being a bit slow, so I'll just finish with the picture of the best named road in the world. If you can't think of a good name for a lane, just name it after your favourite band...